Tag Archives: Tiger Woods

TO BE FAMOUS…I NEED TO OVERCOME ADVERSITY

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Celebrities overcome a multitude of adversities to stay famous. Poor Amanda Bynes went crazy and still manages to tweet random gibberish to stay in the spotlight. Yeah Tom Cruise was raised by aliens but pretending to be a human has made him a great actor.

TIGER WOODS:

Tiger lost everything due to his sex addiction. Now he is back on top of his golf game and every floozy he can hit. Okay so maybe texting is not the best way for Tiger to holla at his ho’s. Not his fault if a plane flies by with his room number.

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JESUS CHRIST:

Jesus is perhaps the most famous and recognized celebrity. He was persecuted, killed and STILL rose to the challenge. Thanks for overcoming adversity and giving us Easter Jesus! To this day, Jesus forgives all and leads by example. Mel Gibson should take a page from the “Jesus playbook”.

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TO BE FAMOUS…I NEED TO CHEAT

Celebrities achieve and maintain fame in many different ways. An Oscar for best supporting actor or maybe even a memorable performance can always help elevate a celebrity’s star status. But CHEATING! That is what will make you FAMOUS!

How do you cheat to gain fame? It’s easy. Just ask Tiger Woods. Texting every hood rat for a bootie call took him from a well-known athlete to famous. Arnold Schwarzenegger entered his maid and the spotlight when he cheated on Maria Shriver.

Lance Armstrong is no exception. Sure we all know him for his Tour De France medals and single nut. But once we learned he doped and cheated; he became famous. So famous that Oprah called him her single greatest interview! Way to “Ball-Up” Lance. We all have learned a valuable lesson; if you want to be famous, you need to cheat and go “Ball Deep”.

TO BE FAMOUS… I NEED TO START A SCANDAL

I have been in many scandals and still can’t break 800 Twitter followers. To be famous…I need to start a scandal with a celebrity. It’s simple. Apparently I don’t need to audition all day long with no call backs and wait tables all night for years trying to get noticed. All I need is to land a nanny or house keeping gig with a celebrity.

Mildred Patricia Baena who? Add a little Arnold Schwarzenegger, a love child and BAM! The whole world knows Mildred. According to Arnold, “She vacuumed the floors by day, and sucked harder than a Hoover by night”. I will make an excellent baby madre!


Maybe I don’t want to be a nanny or house keeper? I may take the old fashioned route to stardom like Brittany Kerr. Strike out on American Idol, get caught cheating with a married country singer and get a reality show. Brittany was known by a few people until the public scandal in a Los Angeles bar with country singer Jason Aldean. Now she is being sought after by cable networks who want to capitalize on her new found fame by giving her a reality show.


So the next time Tiger Woods is in town, I’m going golfing. I will wear a blue dress for Bill Clinton. I am currently tracking Kobe Bryant’s travel itinerary-hotel love fest equals fame. All are very scandalous and are sure fire ways TO BE FAMOUS!