TO BE FAMOUS…I NEED TO SEND A RACIST TWEET

If Steve Martin tweets, his 4.5 million fans laugh. If he tweets something racist, the whole world notices. Controversy equals attention and there is no such thing as bad publicity. To be famous….I need to send a racist tweet.

Sure…many formulas work to garner high volumes of attention. Adding booze to a Lohan, adding Kanye to Kim K, adding steroids to A Rod but adding racism to social media…FAMOUS! Just look at all the attention the interracial Cheerios commercial is getting on Facebook and YouTube. So I too shall follow the yellow brick road to fame and tweet about Mexicans, Jews and Blacks? Oh my!

TACO SHELL=MEXICAN GAS STATION WHICH IS A GAS CAN AND A SIPHONING HOSE.

TO BE FAMOUS…I NEED TO SEND A RACIST TWEET

My piano teacher always told me to practice the piano everyday and I would be famous. Wrongo! Most of us don’t know the names of the world’s top piano players. That’s because the discerning public has determined through YouTube that Fatso, the “Keyboard Cat”, is the second coming of Mozart. Screw years of studying to be a musician or an actor. Social Media is all you need. TO BE FAMOUS I need to Tweet something racist. Lisa Lampanelli can say the N-word on stage and make millions. But tweeting something racist, stupid Moses, why didn’t you tell us about the 11^th commandment; “Thou shall not tweet about the blacks”.

If an unknown woman, Justine Sacco, can send one racist tweet and go from obscurity to famous in a matter of hours, then I’m the Klan’s new Grand Wizard in charge of social media. Sure Justine lost her job, her Twitter account, was globally criticized and had to apologize. But now she is FAMOUS! There’s no such thing as bad publicity.

So here I go trying to get attention by stirring up a little rage. I just want a little publicity, good, bad, just publicity. I’m continuing my racist tweets week by week until I cover the Trifecta; Mexicans, Blacks and Jews. Tune in next week when I tweet about those savages…I mean Redskins!